Saturday, March 21, 2009

random thoughts - confused soul!


i miss you my friend.
the cool breeze and starry night
tells me you are near!

I have a question for you all. Could you ever fall in love with your friend? [i] if Yes - What makes you believe that he/she could be part of your life? [ii] if No - What makes you believe a friend could not be your soul mate?

117 comments:

yamini meduri said...

nice lines...!!!

and abt the question..i dont know the answer...i have never thought abt it...but i feel if your friend is your soulmate...the life ahead will be colorful..!!!

yamini meduri said...

first first first...!!!

karmanna said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Scrawler said...

@karmanna...ha ha..who is that blog friend...please tell us

Scrawler said...

@sawan...why all these thoughts popping up suddenly?

Netika Lumb said...

most certainly you can fall for you friend..
To know if she is "the one", think; if your relationship can beyond the friendly banter, if it can evolve.. And most importantly- If you can actually be romantic with the certain someone :)(no seriously, girls tend to associate lot of importance to small gestures)..


And you know, you will just get to know if she is the one or no. You seriously will :)

state of mind? said...

yes u certainly can n there is nothin in particular dat we can pin point to d cause of being in luv.....its just dat some vibes,some thoughts ,some strings match....souls meet!

the pink orchid said...

i agree.. we can fall in love with a friend.

personal experience tells me if the two are immature and dont over burden the relationship with umpteen pressures it works. in this case both of them have seen each other as best buddies but then once you are committed slowly comparisons start crawling in.. the worst part is here you have a lot to compare..and a lot to crib but at the same time a lot to share and a lot to cherish..

the choice is ours..

thought provoking sawan.. did i make sense.. i fear i just blabbered :P

the pink orchid said...

*mature

karmanna said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Meera said...

Yes you definitely can...I had written a post about this.Here is the link.I hope it helps you decide!

http://last-coffee.blogspot.com/2008/12/thing-called-love.html

Meera said...

In that post I had asked my friend the same question and that is what he answered:)

SMRITI said...

Well Yes...sure U can fall for your friend/ best friend but the future and soul mate... that can get a little tricky. If it happens in movies and the girl and boy have their happily ever after, there are fewer instances of that happening in real life. But doesnt mean that it doesnt happen....IT DOES!

I was in love with a dear dear friend...and I thought back then that it was for keeps...but then, things dont always work out that way and thanks to him, there is no awkwardness in our relationship and we are JUST GOOD FRIENDS now :)


P.S. You neeeed to see friends now!! :P Lemme know when I can lend them to u...some weekend should be fine with me...now dont say this weekend :P You and I live in two different poles of this twin city :P

Amrita~Ams said...

frnds r fun..soul r fun..
soul r romatic..frnd r ?????
i mean it hard to get romantic with frnd...:P :P..
eevn thou..I want my frnd to b soul mate..bcoz the paramount is to b happy..:)

Amrita~Ams said...

i mean soul mate ;)

Ria said...

nice question! :)

The answers are:
i) Yes u can fall for a friend but provided u know how to embrace each others differences. There r many qualities which one can tolerate as friend but not as a partner. So yes a friend can definitely b ur soul mate. It jus depends on how u look at ur relationship with tht friend.

Sakhi said...

I think you can fall for a friend coz you get to know the person well enough (if that much time is spent!). Maybe you'll know the flaws and failures of eachother and perhaps that would help you both in the future.
(BTW, If this is on a personal note; and our wishes are needed, we all do wish you loads for a wonderful outcome!)

Luscious Sealed Lips said...

I really do not understand why people make 'falling in love with your best friend' such a big deal. Do not you already love them? Do you not already want them for your entire life? Are they not already like your soul mates? Then why the fuss? Just because you spent years being 'just friends' and not fantasizing sexually about each other? That is the only difference. The love, care, affection, closeness and comfort will remain the same, right?

I love talking about love. Can go on for pages. ;)

Kisses.

A Poetess said...

nice lines..and if you're asking those questions in a bid to get answers well heres mine:-
HELL YEAH..people who are just friends or even By the way friends can fall in love..what is love anyways but a bloody awakening in ones soul that 'hey, this person right here makes me wanna live out my entire life out with him'..sometimes it happens with strangers, sometimes it happens with people you know..and generally and most commonly those people you 'know' tend to be put under the label of 'friends'...friendship to love is a easy transition but the way back is not so .....you have to be careful if you're thinking of taking it to the next level coz you might just lose ur foot-hold and let friendship slip away..but then if you're confident about ur decision and have decided to put urself out of the misery of ambivalence,this is the way to go buddy

cheer
me :)

rahul said...

I agree with most of them here..yes we can..at the end of the day it's about the comfort we share with the other person!!

Gauri Mathur said...

Apt Lines!:)

And the ans is Yes..
I think Love is unconditonal
Believing will never let that person in ur arms..
Expectations In love should be minimum..

Margaret said...

Fall in love with your friend? Yes, definitely! Your friend can become your soulmate. You've shared so much together, you know each other inside out. Even when you're not together, you know when that frnds suffering or just down. You feel it. If that's not love, I don't know what is.
You can't imagine ur life without him/her. He/she is not only part of ur life, he/she IS ur life.

Hugs...

Siya said...

I think you can. And I speak from total lack of experience.
I think it's bound to come. That feeling. :) When you're friends with a member of the opposite sex..

It's not a big deal to fall for a friend..a friend is a person too..it could be any one. A friend is any one too. Hope I'm not confusing you too much. :P

All you've got to figure is.. whether..it's just a rush of emotions..or is it something more real. (?)

She might still look at you as a friend. OR..she might be pretending to do that..to put a mask over her feelings which may be pretty much the same as yours.

Any way, you ought to take your chances. Leave no regrets. Maybe she loves you back. Maybe she will :)

Diana said...

Certainly yes Sawan...My beau n me were very good frnds first...we were in school n college together..I was always so comfortable with his presence around me. So, when he proposed, my answer was an instant yes.
Only becoz he was a close frnd of mine, things have been so easy all this while.
.
.
.
Beautiful lines dear.

Pallav said...

Fall in love wid friend- yes, wen u feel u r incomplete widout her, wen u need her every piece of advice for ur everything, wen u feel insecure abt her, wen get jealous if she spend her time with somebody else, wen u love to wid her all time, wen u r always for her small small issue, wen u discuss n speak to ur friend only abt her, wen u love to tease her, wen u love to gv her verythng whtevr she wishes, wen u cant see her in tears, if something went wrong wid her, u crib a lot n say why it happened wid her, why not wid me….. blah blah blah..

I can right myriads of other things Anil… because I hv seen all this, n u knw I written blogs on this….

http://pallav-love.blogspot.com/2009/02/b-g-love-only.html
http://pallav-love.blogspot.com/2009/02/boygirl-good-friend-i-doubt.html


hv fun…
cheers:)

Little Girl Lost said...

Sawan,

I fell in love with my best friend, and it took me 3 months to admit it to myself. i don't know how i would have gone about telling him, or whether i would have done so at all, but then one day i didn't need to, because he beat me to it :)
and he still is my best friend :)

Little Girl Lost said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mukund said...

This is my first comment for you... I read your posts...

As to your question I suppose you definately can fall for a friend... then again every relationship i think at some level starts with a bit of friendship so i think you will definately have a head start...
Think about it

Dhanya said...

Of course its possible to fall in love with a friend. Love starts with friendship right ? (unless ur talking about 'love at first sight' kinda thing!)

Kanupriya said...

Yes, you can very much fall in love with ur friend. In fact the comfort factor which you share with ur friend adds to the strength of the relationship. And love lasts longer if there is a friendship in the relationship... this is possible in any case ie., either u fall in love with ur friend or become friends with ur love :-)

Scattered Thoughts... said...

so when are we going to get the good news :P

яノςんム said...

gr8 lines and i saw ur copyright on the picture, it is beautiful..

for ur quest,
I say yes, I can fall in love with my friend. becoming a part of life, as a frnd, is inevitable, but if u talk of union, and spending the life together, i dunno why do i have this notion, but i blv, wen u love sum1, it is not about acquiring that person or possesing him/her. u can still be in love being away and at distance..

Cяystal said...

Firstly, beautifully expressed in those few lines. And yes, I would fall in love with a friend, cos he would definitely be someone of who I know all the faces/phases of.But love necessarily doesn't mean marriage, 'cos love still prevails when distances increase..and hence, I conclude up saying..YES..I could fall for a friend.

swati said...

it was a beautiful post sawan..
im still thinking fr the answer...

sawan said...

yamini, thnx :) may be tht answers the question :)

sawan said...

yamini, yeah u first u first :)

sawan said...

karmanna, hehe, lol.. karmani sure cud be ur best friend :)

sawan said...

scrawler, yeah even me want to know :)

sawan said...

scrawler, results of a discussion with a friend. and u thought i have a soft corner for some one?? :P well, i have a soft corner for many :D

sawan said...

netika, that makes me more confused :P lol.. but how wud i know if she is the one?? :P

sawan said...

state of mind, exactly, thats were the point is.. i forgot how this vibes, thoughts and strigns used to be :(

sawan said...

kajal, i know u wud agree :D i made sense :) now tell me this, who decides if we are matured for the realtionship or not? and what would be the critirea of this decision?

sawan said...

meera, i read the post and it explains love quite well, though i disagree on one point. ive commented it there. but that dsnt answer my confused mind if i shud fall for a friend or not! :(

sawan said...

meera, again experiances counts. the problem here is that my experiences took away trust in the word "relationship". now i want to rebuild it and m pretty confused on how i want to rebuild it :(

sawan said...

smriti, i think i understud what you are tlkaing about. but looking at it, whats the gaurantee for a relationship if the commitment if with some one who wasnot a friend initially? FRIENDS, yeah - i might have a week off next week, 9989691100 - thts my number. send me a msg and i wud call you back.

sawan said...

amrita, why is it so hard to get romantic with friends?? comon yaar, they are human too :( just because they happen to be good enuf to be ur friend shudn make them disqualified for your love :(

sawan said...

ria, perfect. i liked ur answer :)

sawan said...

sakhi, thats wut i had in mind too :) wishes, thts so sweeet of ya :) no, i dont have some one in mind. just had this question in mind :) maybe i might need those wishes soon.. just maybe :P

sawan said...

LSL, luv ya. now thats some wonderful statements you made :) wish everyone thinks like ya! u are welcome to wirte those pages on love. i wud luv to read them :)

sawan said...

poetess, u make me feel better with those words :) exactly what i wanted.. did i tell you that i liked the way u put it? and yes, that answers my question :)

sawan said...

rahul, agreed. thnx for your words bro :)

sawan said...

gauri, how unconditional is the word "unconditional"? ive felt love is definitely conditional, maybe the conditions prescribed would vary. yes, i agree to you wen u talk of minimal expectations. u take care girlie. have fun :)

sawan said...

margaret, you spoke my heart :) needed re asurance and your words gave them :) thnx a lot. luv ya. u take care :)

sawan said...

siya, there is nothing named experianced soul and inexperienced soul.. every one lives their life to have exprriences :) so yes, you talk from experience alrite. thee is so much of positive energy in ur words :) thnx for bringing it to be. u take care :)

sawan said...

diana, wish every one is as lucky as you. you take care and take care of that blessed soul who decided to be with ya :) have fun.

sawan said...

pallav, i cud make out that uve seen all these. ill definitely rread those posts. thnx for your words bro :)

sawan said...

LGL, thts so sweet yar. u r one lucky soul! be happy always :)

sawan said...

mukund, welcome here :) thnx for ur words. i wud be happy to think about it bro :)

sawan said...

dhanya,. i seriously dont believe in love at first sight :) so maybe i take ur advice as Yes :) u take care dear. luv ya :)

sawan said...

knupriya, thats a beautiful way of looking at it! liked the way u explained it :) thnx dear. have fun :)

sawan said...

maheep, not any time soon :P

sawan said...

richa, thnx dear. the picture is a recreation of three images digitally mixed and edited. the original pictures are not mine, but yes the edited and recreated version is :) maybe yes, you and i cud be in love with the distance seperating us. but tell me this, would you bother if the distance disapear? would you dnt want the one whom you love the most to be with you? wouldnt you want to cherish those moments spent together? is it really that you are trying to acquire that person or is it that you are rying to acquire your desires?

sawan said...

aayushi, agreed. but why shudn love find glory in marriage? wuts wrong in it? luv cud or cud not prevail distances, thats antr debate. why cant we associate love with togetherness? thnx for those words dear. u take care. luv ya :)

sawan said...

swati, still thinking?? aaaay, i cud sense a beautiful answer coming up :) wud wait for your thoughts :)

Pretty Me!! said...

lovely lines !! and you can fall in love with anyone .. there is no control over love u see... i just keep a check coz smtimes u tend to lose even ur frnd !!

the pink orchid said...

oye! you have been awarded ..visit my blog.. :D

http://lifeofthepinkorchid.blogspot.com

athi said...

For me no... a friend cant be a lover .. nor can a lover be a friend.

If I don't feel the attraction initially, I never do. And when I'm not feeling that way about somebody I can't be in love.

Purva said...

hmm...i have 2 close friends. I fell in love with one. After 2 years of awesome friendship i realised he is the one for me...sadly he doesn't feel the same. The other one is like a part of me with whom i can never romanticize. He treats me as his another guy friend...and it's a beautiful relationship that way....
Love the lines you've written

ARUNA said...

hey keeping it sweet n simple.......yes you can by all means fall in love with your friend...its the bond that you already share with him/her makes u believe that he/she is the one you can spend ur rest of life with!! Ask the xperienced ones :)

Keshi said...

who r ya missing Sawan? ;-)

yes u can fall in love with a friend. I believe that a good r'ship wud always start with FRIENDSHIP.

Hope all is well with ya...today I got some time to check on my darling friends in Blogville, so I did :) wow I miss u all!


Keshi.

Harshita said...

Beautiful lines...

Yeah! u can easily fall for ur friend...thts so very normal.

Lena said...

a stupid question from you.. you dont choose who to fall in love with, love does start with friendship and then it grows up into something bigger or does not...

and a real friend is always a soulmate, but maybe not the kind of soulmate you meant :P

love is illogical, you just fall in love not caring if someone is your friend or anything like that, just when it is a close, really close friend, we have a dilemma if we should risk friendship fearing that if another relationship wont work out we will lose both the love and the friendship..

But then.. like i said.. you dont choose whom to love :)

Kartz said...

Lovely haiku, bro'...

Heh heh, your question? Will answer it when I find out myself. Not quite qualified enuf. ;)

Trust all is well at ur end.

Peace.

Preetilata【ツ】 said...

oh a haiku....... wowwwwww its lovely. :)

yes one could fall in love with him/her friend. but i dnt now d reasons anizie. ;(

sawan said...

pratzi, u keep a check ?? :P lol

love shudn be controlled u see :) if u cud possibly loose a friend for loving him/her, then whats the meaning of tht friendship?

sawan said...

kajal, u r a swthrt, u know tht right? :P thnx dear :)

sawan said...

athi, u closed the doors of ur life to the people who chose to be with ya :( it wud be hard on ur friends.. what if some one wants to take the relationship to a higher level? u cud atleast give him a chance, cant ya?

sawan said...

purva, how did ya cope up to the situation when u realized that ur friend dsnt feel tha same way u felt for him? wud luv to know more about how u handled it!

sawan said...

ask the experienced ones, huh??ill take ur advice sweets :)

sawan said...

keshi, i miss ya. wud u marry me? :P
m wonderful re..now tht u r back m sure i wud be more happy now :)

sawan said...

harshita, wish every one thinks like that :)

sawan said...

lena darlin, every post has a story behind it :)

its not tht i am taking permission to fall in love :) i had a discussion with a friend who said tht she cant fall in love with her friends. since i had a different opinion about it, i wanted to know how the rest of my friends wud react :)

agreed to wut u say and wud keep every word in mind :)

sawan said...

kartz, bro, m wonderful :) thts a easy way out tht u opted by not answering it huh?? :P m sure u know the answer, dnt shy away :D wuts happening at ur end bro?

sawan said...

preetzie, lena says love is illogical and hence i shudn be asking for the reasons, but i still want the reasons.. so better think about it and answer those wns :P or else donate ur share of chocolates to me when lena darlin visits india :)

Keshi said...

HAHA Sawan r ya proposing to me now? awww...ofcourse I'd marry ya! ur a wonderful guy. And then we can code in C# together and become a real geeky couple!

The problem is Im not sure if u wud wanna marry someone like me...cos Im so not 'wife-material' lol!

Keshi.

Rakesh Vanamali said...

Of course yes, you can fall in love with your friend....why not? you know him / her well! And thats reason enough for that person to be part of your life!

I'm missing someone very big time as I write out this comment!

Good blog btw....!

Chronicwriter said...

human beings can fall in love with their friends..

mail was a surprise one indeed..

coffee mayte

cheers it is

www.chronicwriter.com
chriz

Renu M said...

i feel u can. in fact better

sawan said...

keshi, i am a wonderful guy!! really?? any one heard that?? :P
u r a swthrt :) 'wife-material'- what is that?

sawan said...

Rakesh, welcome to my space :) thnx for ur kind words :) u miss somw one?? really?? why cant you ring her back into ur life? try, maybe!

sawan said...

chriz, my bro :) good to cya here :) i wud check ur blog for sure.. aftr all u r ma cofee mate :D

sawan said...

Renu, thnx dear :)

everything burns... said...

you can't fall in love with a friend... either you were in love even before u were friends or its just platonic...
and soul mate and life partner are 2 totally different things... not to be confused with each other.

Saranya said...

Of course YES! It would be wonderful. The rationale is, a true love comes after a good understanding btw two, and this can happen if you are good friends with someone. Friendship can always be a bridge to love but with a narrow line btw them. :)

sawan said...

jahnabhi, i agree, it wud be platonic.. but then it could also be sensual? why cant it be? your friend is a human being too? there could be moments where you felt a beat for him/her. of course there would be a tint of intellectual/emotional bond even then.

sawan said...

saranya, that narrow line is creating all the problems :P lol

Simply Sur said...

Falling in love with your friend is so natural... it is jus the circumstances u need to adjust with!
Sometimes both the friends can b in love and they accept it and they can be there for each other forever but not together!!
So that's wat's called Life!! :)

sawan said...

surabhi, how sweet does it sound :) wish it happens with me too :P lol.

destiny's child... said...

hmmm...that query is something...i have never actually thought abt it...somehow, falling in love with your best friend doesn't seem right to me. after all, friendship is above everything, even love.
ah..i dont know....

anyways,..i just love ur blog... it looks really good! u have customized it well...:)

sawan said...

veena, thts such a grt compliment :) thnx dear :) and think about it, the more you think, the more you get confused :D falling in love with your best friend doesn't seem right to you!! only cos friendship is something above love? is it really above love? wud love to hear from ya :)

destiny's child... said...

mm...honestly...i dont know...;)
waiting to get an answer in ur next post....:)

Netika Lumb said...

How would you know, she is the one??? IF I give you some weird dialogue to ponder over-then I would say that God will tell you.. WAit for his signal.. And spend some quality time thinking if you want to spend the rest of your life with her. Its about life, it isn't about weeks, months, decades only..remember this

sawan said...

veena, read the comments. may be it wud help.. i am searching for an answer here,, and i gues almost all say yes to a friend ending up as a soul mate!

sawan said...

netika, how wud that signal be?i am still confused :( [well, for your info. i am not in love with a friend. its just that i had a conversation with a friend and we argued over this very qns. so i wanted to clarify my thoughts. now enlighten me] :)

яノςんム said...

desires Sawan, desires. there is no end to them.. i try being a contented person... :)

Kartz said...

Ha ha... Naah, am not avoiding your question. I was being brutally honest. My take on love is completely different. I find it tantalizing (that's my response to almost all posts on *love*)

What is love? It is an emotion. And the degree of love varies. You love your family, you love your friends. When it comes to a partner, again, you love him/her. But then, there is a thin line differentiating each of the relationships above, right? The word used stays the same but the "feeling" is different.

Coming to your question... Friendship is a type of relationship too. Now... As I see it, a person comes to ur life for one of 3 things - a reason, a season, a lifetime.

It is when you realise *why* that person has come in to your life... It isn't easy, mind you. 'Cos, once u go wrong in figuring out, you get consumed with a feeling of being wretched.

All I'll say is, if you really feel you are having a *good* time with that friend, allow things to develop. Let things happen. Do *not* try to make your will happen. Do not go overboard. Caprices won't help. Haste makes waste. Period.

In other words, if it is meant to be, it will.

Sorry for the rather long and dreary response. It is my opinion and you are welcome to share your views.

Am doing well, bro'. Thanks for asking. Keeping myself occupied these days.

Peace.

♀»$tuti™ ღ ... said...

i think its not gud...........
the relationship changes n so do behavior, responses n responsibilities........ i dont like this thought..
sorry if u feel bad its not ppointing on u...... its jus my view abt it....:)

sawan said...

Stuti, why shud i feel bad? :) u r welcome to share ur thoughts. i think i understud your concern regarding the said relationship. and its justified. but what do we do if we feel attracted towards a friend? :P

sawan said...

kartz, bro, i loved the way u answered it :) thnx for ur patience :) wud keep every word in mind. have fun :)

sawan said...

richa, its not bad to follow desires at times, is it? after all whats life all about! you seem to think a lot!! happy to know ya :)

Kartz said...

Not a prob. It was a pleasure to elucidate my view. Well, just that, I speculate before making a point. Cos, tbh, I don't wanna make it seem like a pompous, self-opinionated, bourgeois, skull-duggerish homily!

Rather, I must thank you for your patience in reading it in its entirety!

Peace.

sawan said...

why do i feel that u carefully pick each word that u write - be it poetry or a comment?? :) thnx bro. have fun :)

athi said...

not wen i know it cant work :)

athi said...

wtf???? y moderation?? Come on!!

sawan said...

:)

cant help it athi.. seems like some one is too interested in writing abusive comments on every post regardless of the content :P even m not liking comment moderation, but i dnt have a choice here :(

Netika Lumb said...

How would the signal be.. Is this question only for clarification or is it more of anticipation :P

Well, such discussions aren't ever that objective so I guess I shall not be able to enlighten you unfortunately :(

sawan said...

oo netika, i seriously wanted to know.. m tired of being single :P feel so damn lonely at times :(