Wednesday, October 15, 2008

a drama called life

This is gona be the lengthiest post in here. Sorry for that. The story is based on true incidents. In life i played the role of Neil.

Sam loved cricket. He did three things - he played cricket, prayed to Jesus and studied. Ask him about Aamir Khan and his response would be "Aamir who?"! He was in twelth and he got many friends - all of them were boys. For reasons unknown he hardly talked to girls. Maybe he was scared that his friends would make fun of him. Maybe he was too shy and the last thing he wanted was to hear his name tagged with a girl. He was happy with his life.

Keerthi was a chatterbox. She was one among the very few extroverts in college. She would talk to one and all. She made friends easily. Small things made her happy. You could never miss a smile on her face. Everyone in the college was her friend and hence the question of a boy friend never arose! The last thing she wanted was to shut up and close the doors which connected her to the world! She was happy with her life.

Sam finishes his twelth, joins engineering and take his fav subject for a career. Keerthi does the same - only that the subject and the college were different.

Four years passed by. Sam goes abroad to build up his career. Someone said Keerthi was not very interested in finding a job. She stayed at home! Everyone was so busy in search of a job, busy to build a career, busy with their own life. Did people miss to see the silence in Keerthi or did they just chose not to bother?

A year later old friends catch up for gossips and old memories. No one has heard from Keerthi lately. Strange!

Two years later Neil felt somethings wrong about his friends - Sam and Keerthi. Both behaved weird. Sam, who was the ideal husband for the most traditional girls, started finding pleasure in alcohol. Keerthy, who was fun to be with, suddenly became too silent. Neal decides to talk and he gets two version of stories:

Version 1 : Sam : 12th Class : Keerthi and Sam went to the same tuition class. Keerthi used to talk to SAM from there. Sam was excited but made sure no one got a hint that they were talking. He considered it a sin to talk to a girl! Later this chit chat became lengthier conversations. During engineering they started liking each other. He would go to her house asking for notes. She drew diagrams on his record books. By the end of engineering they were in love. He went abroad to make quick money. She waited at home for him to come back. He made ISD calls and wasted half of his hard earned income. Now she seems to move away. She is no more interested in him. She says she wants a career and she cant marry him. He came all the way to India just to see her, to talk to her, to convince her. He had to borrow money from his friends for the flight tickets. She refused to talk to him. Refused to see him. He was lost. She ditched him. he would never be able to love another girl. She drained out his love and left him all alone. So he started finding happiness in alcohol. He started it to forget the pain, to sleep, to live. He was not happy with his life.

Version 2 : Keerthi : 12th Class : She talked to Sam the way she talked to everyone. The more she knew him she took care that the conversation went private. She din want to hurt him. She thought he was cute and kiddish. She liked him. He talked to her in a way that no one has ever talked to her. She felt as if he is dependent on her. Slowly she began to open up. During engineering she fell in love with him. Her world began to shrink. He became her world. His words were final and she began to oblige. He went abroad to make money for them He promised he would come back and take her with him. She waited at home. Loneliness killed her. Her friends were gone - busy with their work. She din bother. He was too possessive and hated the idea of her talking to a guy, even if the guy was a common friend. She din complain. Slowly he began to take her for granted. He wanted her to come online whenever he wished. Even if she was sick or feeling low he would ask her to login. Her ideas, her interests, her emotions were not taken care of! She felt as if she was a puppet. She could take it no more. She couldn't fake a smile any more. She wanted her life back. She could only look back and cry at the amount of time she has wasted for him. She got a job. Slowly she began to recover. She got her friends back. She began to smile but the pain was still there. She was not happy with her life.

<-After 3 long year-> <-today->

Keerthy has moved on.She has a job. She is happy. Her decision is strong. She is getting married to a person of her choice - a guy who would treat her as a person, who would respect her for what she is and who would love her with all his will. Her parents are happy. Her friends are happy.

Sam is still in UAE. He refuse to come back. He is not the same Sam his friends knew. He works, drinks and sleep. He tries to be sarcastic in his words but end up being stupid. He doesn't like Neil. He thinks Neil din help him much in getting Keerthy back. She left him - it hurted his ego more than his heart!

Neil talks to both of them. He is happy for Keerthy and sad for Sam. He tried to convince Sam but in vein. Neil chose to back Keerthy for the following reasons:

* Neil believes that if a guy loves a girl he should be ready to accept her the way she is.
* Preventing the girl from talking to a guy out of insecurity feel is due to the lack of trust in their relationship. If there is no trust, there is no relationship.
* Everybody has got their own private space. At times its better to respect the space and keep your distance. Your wife or your love is also an individual. Acknowledge the fact.

If you have read till now and is still alive [:-)] i have a question for you. If you were Neil, how would you react? Also, what is your piece of advice for Keerthy and Sam?


Preeti said...

My reaction as
Niel same as yours, but I would maintain a safe distance between both of them. Sam and keerthi. Dont ask me why :) Its just a feeling.

Advice to
Sam : hey you, learn to trust her more and chuck out excessive alcohol. its not a solution to anything:)

Keerthi : choose your partner twice before entering a committed relationship. Because once you enter, there should be no turning back.

Sam and Keerthi were not in love. It was an illusion that they really loved each other. In love, there is only give and no take. there are no rules or expectations.

Anil Sawan said...

preetz : i may pass ur comment to them :-)

"In love, there is only give and no take" - i disagree => men GIVE their purse and women TAKE the remote! ;-)

lukkydivz said...

all i can say is- definitely they were not in love!

i dont any point in sam not liking neil :O

lukkydivz said...

i dont see*

david santos said...

Great work!
Have a nice day.

Priya Joyce said...

the points u used on behalf of neil.. I cumpletely agree to them.. but I wud like to add tat in a relationship I think sumtymes keerthy shud also sacrifice her interests..this applies to sam too

If this wud hav happened then the relationship wudn't hav broken

niice post..

vinny said...

hey bloglist didnt update this post still shows TV ho tho BIG TV ho!!

as neil, i would not back either of them since they have given me 2 different versions whereas the truth would be one n also the truth which they both do not want to c... LOVE is the purest n most powerful emotion that makes humans divine...probably in their younger days, they didnt realise that its abt giving, its abt sacrifice...the arguements should have died with times..but it didnt since ego was involved!! Keerthi shouldnt have left Sam to drink n kill all his desires..i believe keerthi wont be happy after doing this to him..Keerthi n Sam should have sat n talked in person n then decided if they r really ready to accept the other without changes,without expectations other than pure love, then thats true love n a happy life surely !!

BTW, this story is a very common one...some of the couples after all the years of fighting n growing up simultaneously, realised for themselves that they werent in love ever n so mutually broke off...wishing luck to each other!
but some of them still never realised, they r busy fighting n blaming the other for 'loving less' n for their career mistakes n sometimes even for the domestic issues at home!!

well, most of us fall in love during junior college, but only later we realise whether we truely love our partners or just using them as 'ego boosters'..if u ever find urself in such a situation, be honest n let the other know...
there will be some pain initially for the true lover but GOD will help them!!
but never play games in love, NEVER

Anil Sawan said...

@ divz: thats what every comon friend said!

"i dont see any point in sam not liking neil " - u dont know how u behave when emotions overcome your thoughts :-)

Anil Sawan said...

@ david: thnx for visiting. good day!

Anil Sawan said...

@ priya: thnx for your words. ive seen that gils when get into a relationship changes drastically. agree it or not, the level of their patience get boosted up to an unknown level. They would be calm when they should shout. They would let go all of their interests for the benefit of the relationship. Salute to all the girls for this. But as every good thing has a side effect, guys usually chooses to turn a blind eye towards this quality of girls. They think or chooses to think that this silence of girls is their weakness! This eventually makes things worse and they start to take the girl for granted. You and me are after all humans. A girl is a human. Her mind is like a volcano. The more it is silent, the more powerful the eruption would be. Even the girl wouldnt have control on it beyond a limit. For a relationship to go well - i guez, there should be no sacrifices. The very term sacrifice would mean that u are letting go of some thing which u desire. If you have the feel then at one point of time you tend to compare the losses. If I am happy with my girl where does the term sacrifice stand in my life? Its all about how u and me see things.. its all about stability of our minds.. its all about love :-)

Appy said...

I thought i would also pour in my expert comments.I think both of ur friends should know that getting into a relationship is very easy and maintaining it is the difficult task.Another advice for
Sam: this dude needs to come to reality and ask him to stop watching hindi movies.where hero start drinking to find solace.He needs to have trust and give explain take example of his parents.If his parents ask him to stop going out or movong around and only wait for them to talk or share .how would he feel.May be he can think about the feeling what she went thru and in long distance relationship there r 2 imp thingsa).trust & communication

Kirti:She took a gud decision as being in same relationshil wouldn't fetch anything in long term.In future it will be like a compromise and we all have only one life to enjoy.It must very relaly hard the stress and lonely feeling she went thru.

Neil: U did a gr8 job by trying ur best as friends are there to help us in these kin of situation and not run away or make distance when it becomes bad

Anil Sawan said...

vins.. dnt worry, ur blog roll is getting updated.. :-)

there is a reason why keerthy and sam gave neil two versions. The reason is that keerthy told him a story which she believed or which she thought had happened. same with sam. the idea is that two of them looked at things at two different ways which is a fair play. if i do something, i obviously would think that its right and i would have my own justifications for that. but my rights may not be true for u or a third person! thats called conflict of interests!
about sacrifice, you may look at my comment to priya.
you said keerthy shouldnt have let sam drink. right. but tell me this : two years is lot of time. an extrovert of 23 years becomes an introvert for 2 years. she chose to close the very doors which connects her to this world! She chose to let go her interests, her career, her smile - if that could be termed as sacrifice, i would say that very sacrifice ruined their relationship. love is only a word which tries to explain varied emotions. its highly contextual. imagine u having a boy friend and he says " i love you ". Now imagine we having a conversation and i say " I love you". Now your boy friend and I uttered the same words to the same person, but you could differentiate the emotions involved. So what is love more than a mere word? Its how you interpret the word that matters! I seriously dont believe there are two types of love - pure and impure! What is an impure love? lust, infatuation?? maybe there is another word to express it!

Of course the story is very comon. The saddest part is that even then people are reluctant to find out the very foundation of this problem. If you want to welcome a girl into your life, welcome her for what she is and not for what you could make her! marriage is an union of two ideas. There should be negotiations and not sacrifices.
ah man, does my comment look a lil bigger.? its an interesting topic, i could debate for hours :-)


Anil Sawan said...

@ appy : Vandy, i am happy u commented! guez what, thats exactly what i told sam and keerthy :-) and thnx for the good words.. Neil is honored:)

david santos said...

Hello, Sawan!
Yes my friend. My work is for a good cause. It is against the abuse of children.
Have a nice weekend.

David Santos - Portugal

athi said...

Loved d two versions of d plot. :)
Keerthi shud have never left her life for her love. Often most gals feel affection towards one person should forcefully block all other emotions , bt dats not true. You often end up feeling dejected and alone. Nobody can have a life centered around another person, at least not if u have a choice.Bt yes, she is definitely to an extent responsible for Sam's misery, cos deep inside obviously she would have known that she can't be kept in a cage like that, and should have let go then itself. On the other hand its also possible that she wanted to give him a chance to understand her feelings and space, maybe she thought d relationship ws worth dat effort. Sam should hav realised dat she ws givin up too much for him and shoul have let her free accordingly. U cant love and suffocate a person at d same time, it's just not fair. Bt i ges evryone learns frm deir own mistakes, I'm sure dey both learnt sumtin frm deirs n in future twil do both of dem good. Keerti has moved on and Sam wil too. Evrytin happens for a reason.

Anil Sawan said...

@david: nice to see you here sir. I am honored by your visit.

Anil Sawan said...

@athi : i wish sam learn something from all this. Inspiring words :-)

Anonymous said...

Who are Keerthy and Sam?